Marrying your Ex

So, you get an email from your ex that says "If neither one of us are married in 3 years/by the time I'm 40/by 2015/whatever then let's get married"

A little background on this ex:

He/she
1. broke your heart. Left you and it was "me not you" and you were at a loss. Absolutely devastated you. You thought they were the one. Told you that you are a great person and a great friend, but it just wasn't what they wanted.
2. may or may not have kids (probably does)
3. knows that you want to settle down and eventually be married with a family.


These pacts are generally positive if between two friends who have never been romantically entangled. If there is history it is generally ugly.

In the case of the Ex you should of course say NO because:

He/she
1. has gotten out into the world realized that you were a good person and would do anything for them - and now that they are getting older they realize that their options are no longer once what they were as far as finding a mate.
2. getting older and don't want to die alone (who does?)
3. (if #2 is true) realize that you truly loved and cared for their kids and provided for all of them emotionally and physically and they took it for granted
4. is manipulating you. Using #3 and keeping you hanging on for that "Just in case" situation. Yeah you are in a good relationship right now, but why move forward with that when the person that you have always loved (and would still do anything for) has opened the door and given you a chance. (I've seen this one happen -- it gets to the drop dead date and the Ex is dating someone and either 1. pushes back the date telling you that this relationship isn't too serious, but you want to see where it is going to do 2. tells you they were kidding). Women are the worst offenders when it comes to manipulation, and often they will pick on the softhearted man that will forever love them.

In all likelihood, if you said YES anyway (especially the males).

Most people won't listen to a word I write, but I feel better having posted my warning.